Disorganized Crime.

After reading three hundred and twelve, okay I may be exaggerating – three hundred and eight – scathing reviews of Luc Besson’s The Family, I found myself wondering whether they had all seen a different film to the one I sat through. Now I’m not saying it’s a great film. I’m not even saying it’s a film that you’re likely to remember in two years time. And I’m definitely not saying it’s likely to win any Awards. But I enjoyed it – and so did all four of the people I went to see it. Similarly six of the seven other people who I know have seen it enjoyed it too. So what’s your goddamn problem, film critics? “Well it’s not exactly The Godfather is it?” Well of course it bloody isn’t. That doesn’t mean it’s not worth watching. To me, it’s just further evidence that film critics are of more detriment than benefit to the film industry. I know that seems an odd thing to read in a film review blog, but (as I’ve said in previous posts) I would never try to deter anyone from seeing any film. In fact I would encourage people to go and see every film that they can, regardless of what I score it out of ten. I believe my point is perfectly summarized in this screen shot from Metacritic:

As you can see, critics seem to be of a “let’s bash any film that isn’t Academy Award material” persuasion. Whereas actual humans are much more simple. If they like it – they say so, if they don’t – they say so. What’s so hard about that? Exactly. I would however like to take a moment to doff my hat to the 8 ‘professional’ reviewers that had the bottle to admit they enjoyed the film, when it would have been so much easier just to drag it through the mud.

Ok, now that I’ve got that off my chest I suppose I should talk about the film. (Imagine if now I said “it’s total shit – avoid at all costs.)

The Family in question consists of a somewhat psychopathic New York mobster-turned-snitch with a $20-million contract on his head (Robert De Niro); his bored soccer mom/dangerous psychopath wife (Michelle Pfeieffer); their typical lovesick teenager/dangerous psychopath daughter (Dianna Agron); and finally her bullied nerd/dangerous psychopath younger brother (John D’Leo). You may have spotted a theme there. Anyway, The Family, renamed the Blakes, are in witness protection in France after turning rat on The Family back in The States.

It’s a strange mixture tonally. It flits from comedy to black comedy to action to drama with all the conviction of a moth at a disco. That being said, if you just sit back and take it as it comes then it’s still enjoyable. Some bits will make you smile, some bits might make you gasp, some bits may even make you laugh out loud  and some bits – if you are particular squeamish – might even make you look away in terror. One thing it probably wont make you do is care. De Niro is warm and affable, but there’s no denying his character is basically evil, so he won’t get a great deal of sympathy from audiences, though you do pretty much root for him throughout the movie. Another thing this film is unlikely to  make you do much is think. Perhaps because the script isn’t the strongest or perhaps because Besson is just playing to his strengths – big, brash, and unashamedly focused on entertainment rather than enlightenment. The only real conflict faced by De Niro’s character here seems to be that he genuinely thinks he’s a decent chap. And while his part is essentially a vegan appetizer for one, compared to the relative meatiness of some of his past roles, he still has the charisma and inherent watchability of that guy from Raging Bull.

The supporting cast aren’t really given a great deal to do, but they all put in a decent showing. Pfeiffer’s Brooklyn accent grates a little at times but she manages to avoid the “annoying wife” label and there is the occasional moment where she is allowed to show the chemistry she shares with her on-screen hubby. Agron character is certainly the worst written – her journey from a super tough mob-daughter beating the crap out of a girl for stealing her pencil-case to semi-suicidal emo teen and back again does not register as genuine on any level but, that’s no fault of the Glee star. John D’Leo’s wiseguy-kid works better and I can see him becoming ever-more prevalent in the years to come. Tommy Lee Jones plays the grumpy (surprise, surprise) FBI agent in charge of protecting them all with his trademark lovable gruffness.

Besson directs as you would expect – quite a bit of style – not a lot of substance. But in a film with such a variable tone, it kind of works. Whether it’s the borderline sepia filter applied when the bad guys are roaming the streets or the, in my view brilliant, use of the Gorrilaz track ‘Clint Eastwood’ when the aforementioned baddies step off a train, one by one – it doesn’t seem out-of-place because everything seems out-of-place. Including a body count to rival The Terminator – bystanders are dispatched with a much thought as you or I would put in to swatting a fly buzzing around a picnic.

That being said, there are one or too moments in which the film does go from “ridiculously fun” to just plain ridiculous. For example , the way in which the big-bag-boss-guy (who is in prison!) finds out where the ‘Blakes’ are hiding is probably the single most contrived bit of writing I have ever witnessed in a film. The threat of rape at one point also seems really out-of-place and struck me a last-ditch attempt to ground the film in the grim reality of mob life, but it’s just a very awkward swing and a miss.

One scene in particular seems to have split viewers 50/50 – critics have zeroed in on it as being ‘tragic’ and ‘preposterous,’  I found hilarious – sees Mr Blake (posing as a writer, as part of his cover) invited to watch and critique an american movie at the local film club. The film turns out to be Goodfellas. Arguably the best mafia movie of all time appearing in what is unarguably not seems to enrage critics for some reason which is unfathomable to me. It shows De Niro and Scorsese (an executive producer on this picture) are game for a laugh and to me, the scene underlines the fact that you shouldn’t be taking any of what you’re seeing on-screen too seriously.

It may lack sincerity but it smacks of fun. 6/10

The Family at IMDb

The Family at Rotten Tomatoes